***WHY DON'T WE POST HOW & WHERE WE WERE.....

[sickofit]

I was thinking...
I really want to figure this out. Are the doctors just not good or is it really a mental thing.

I thought the best would be to find out where we were, what happened, and how we were feeling when this all started for us. And then, what are our thoughts & physical feeling on a particular day now. Meaning do we feel sick each and every day? Or does it come & go?
Maybe we can find a common thread? Try to solve it.

[hypotoo]

Are the doctors not good at what exactly?

Oh, are the doctors so dumb that they can't find out what's wrong with me? Is that the question?

In general a trained physician is smarter than a hypochondriac 365 days out of 365 days.

We just think we're smart, and they missed something. That is delusional thinking....yep, delusional, non-rational, mixed-up...or just plain crazy.

Where was I when I realized I had hypochondria? In a psychiatrists office.

How do I feel today, yesterday, the day before..., I feel great. No problems, no anxiety, no depression. I'm in remission, or I'm cured.

Why am I better?.....Because I admitted I needed help....I sought help....I took the advice.... I took the medication... and it worked.

[sickofit]

I never went to doctors...never thought about health.

Three years ago, out of the blue, I felt sick.
It never went away. I then got scared it was something scary. I don't want to die. I don't want to be sick.
Each and every day all I think about it why I feel so tired, why my symptoms never go away.
I think, if this was just anxiety, then wouldn't my symptoms go away periodically.
I read alot of these posts, it seems that for almost all, symptoms come & go or change.
DOES ANYONE ON HEAR HAVE CONSTANT, SAME , SYMPTOMS THAT DO NOT GO AWAY NO MATTER HOW MUCH SLEEP, RELAXING YOU DO.
I am deperate to not feel different...I am desperate to feel well.

[hypotoo]

Sounds to me like you may have some depression driving your anxiety. Some people feel anxious all the time. They report feeling like they are constantly on alert or "on edge".

When my depression was really bad a long time ago I had anxiety all day long. Never waxed or waned.

All day anxiety is something that needs medical attention. You're not physically ill, but you might develop physical sensations, and falsely interpret them as "symptoms" of something else. This is a very common thing with hypos.

We think we have symptoms, when we don't actually have any.

[outtolunch]

When I was 20, I felt like I was 80. I was constantly tired, I would feel shaky and gross after eating a meal. I was convinced I either had diabetes or pancreatic cancer, because I couldn't fathom how I could feel so gross, living off of McDonald's almost every day, getting no exercise and constantly stressed-out over something or the other. I ignored the obvious signs of why I felt so badly and automatically jumped to the deadly or incurable diseases. Which made the stress worse. Which fueled my anxiety. The doctor put my on paxil,I began walking every day, and changed my eating habits. I felt 20 again.

I'm 29 now and am still recovering from the worst episode of anxiety I've ever had. It turns out something physical was actually going on---BUT DON'T FREAK OUT! I'm not finished yet---I am not dying. The doctors, several of them, have proven this to me, but it's up to me to get over the obsessive worrying and worst-case scenarios to actually believe them. I'm physically in very, very good shape except for a little hand weakness which is transient and is improving---NOT ALS. But for mos. that's what I thought I had. The point I'm trying to make is this: I have trust issues. I've had them since childhood and grew up basically not trusting anyone. The only way I've been able to recover, at least to this point, has been by trusting that my neurologist is a competent, well-trained, caring individual. When he says the tests are normal and that I'm doing great, I need to understand that there are years of experience and studying and observations he's made to come to this conclusion.

[lemmink]

Heh, I thought I'd contribute to this despite the fact that it's an old post...

[[[I thought the best would be to find out where we were, what happened, and how we were feeling when this all started for us. And then, what are our thoughts & physical feeling on a particular day now. Meaning do we feel sick each and every day? Or does it come & go?]]]

My three best mates who were all under 21 got diagnosed with HIV, two brain cancers and cervical cancer between them. I got a rare bowel virus and a lump in my abdomen which I could feel constantly. When I went to the doctors, none of them would accept that I had these problems. They were like, oh, it's IBS! Nothing to worry about.

I spent six months shitting neon green liquid with sparkles in it (I wish I was joking) and cramping around my abdomen and being absolutely depressed. Eventually I forced a doctor to test me for things and would not leave the surgery until they did. Testing resulted in them discovering that yes, I did have a fairly large lump in my abdomen - it was a lipoma, a benign growth thingy - and that I was shitting neon green liquid for no reason. They could do nothing about the lump, I'd just have to live with it, and they had no idea about the greenness but assumed it was a rare bacteria/virus and I'd get over it in time.

I did.

If I'd gone to the doctor and explained this to them and they hadn't responded with, "You're lying, that doesn't happen, I can't feel anything," but actually tested my problems, I doubt I'd be in this position now. Once I actually GOT the answer I wanted and they acknowledged the symptoms, then all the hypo symptoms stopped happening and my life went on.

The second time it started was around my anal fissure, which was repeatedly diagnosed as hemmorhoids and was actually CAUSED by a retarded idiot doctor who prescibed me high dose painkillers without explaining to me the risks involved. This doctor also lost all my records, prescibed me mad things, prescribed me drugs that did not exist, and generally screwed me over. The fissure's almost weekly recurrence, because of the huge impact it has on my life, started the hypo train all over again.

I get hypo in all directions when I have an illness that is not identified correctly by a doctor and recurrs constantly, having an impact on my life. The two times I've had a 'case' of hypo this is how they started.

[soworried]

I think mine started when i was 18 and my mom had a heartattack at the house for 1st time on my bday night. We had gone out for supper and then later that night she was laying and bed and got sick we had to call the ambulance and turned out to be a heartattack.

During my early 20 s it was not so bad. Just a few occasional epsidoes like my hair i thought was falling out, then thought something was wrong with my stomach,

then had high liver enzymes level which they thought was becuase i had hepatities i did not but that did not help my being hypo.

I am now almost 37 and it was getting worse and finally went on prozac and i dont worry as much. It has not taken it all away but it has helped.
I wasted so much time worrying ...i dont want to waste more time worrying and being depressed. I realize that I am control freak and no matter how much exercise vitamin chewing testing we do we are all going to die one day. I hate that but that is life and what matters is what I do with the time i have.

[elin]

For me it started when I got wrongly diagnosed with a lung embolism.

The panic didn't come instantly, but later, at home when I was going to sleep. And since the panic always comes in te evening - the later, the worse the panic.

I have a panic attack aproximitly once a week. In between I either don't think about it at all, or walk around feeling constantly worried, but being able to control it.

[nemesis]

I had issues like having to go back and lock my car more then 3 times (lock it, manage to get about 10 feet away then having to turn back around to check, repeatedly) and when riding in the car my toes had to be down during the spaces and up while passing a telephone pole (which is ridiculous, really). The car thing started when I was 16 and I made myself stop and have to be on guard against it starting again. The toe thing... maybe since I was 9? 10? I think it started as some kind of game and then became a necessity for me for no reason that makes any sense. Actually, heh, I think I managed to mostly stop that at right around the time I got my car and did nothing but worry about if it was locked or not. The obsession with my health started right around the time I went to college and has stayed with me ever since. It's actually harmful that I can get on the internet and look up whatever symptom is bothering me because it just gives me so many more options to worry about.

I feel fine more often then not. If anything goes wrong though (like my ear swelling after I hurt it) I jump to the worse conclusion and feel, literally, sick to my stomach until I can distract myself (which is sometimes impossible to do and the thoughts will keep coming back until the problem is gone). Two weeks ago I decided I was allergic to my new face wash. And maybe I was and maybe I wasn't, I'm not a reliable person when it comes to determining that. So, I basically had 3 bad days over the face wash, followed by 12 good days of only minor, fleeting worries, followed by what is so far 5 days and counting of worry about my ear.

I suspect, though, that psychiatrists have more of this figured out then I ever will.

[Misvenus000]

I was about 15 years old and I had my first panic attack. I called 911 on myself because I just knew that something was wrong with me. I was going out of my mind and I was really upset that no one was there for me. I had my bouts of release and I lived a few years without Hypochondria. I saw my grandmom having a seizure and wind up having a brain tumor. I also have my grandfather who has cancer in his colon and his bladder. There not blood related but there issues scared me. So I always think I have these issues. This is kind of where it started. I also have Post traumatic stress and I am very OCD. I have a very bad compulsion issue. Its a long story. But, it all kind of started when I was about 15. Its been on and off since then.

[scared2death]

The foundation for my hypochondria was laid when i was a very little girl. My parents had a horrible marriage and they constantly fought and beat each other up. They made me feel afraid and not empowered in life. And they both had hyper awarenes of germs and illness- so the beginnings were learned from them -coupled with the fear and lack of control their fighting made me feel. Then when I was 20 years old, during the middle of college finals, I went completely blind in my right eye. I was immediately diagnosed with MS and I spent a week or so in the hospital taking IV steroids to get my eyesight back. I did get most of it back, too. So this MS event REALLY got me going too, along with all the childhood stuff -it just made me feel like I AM the one in a million who gets the rare and horrible disease. All my friends felt invincible and I feel like I had no control over anything and that if something bad could happen it would happen to me. But even so I did carry on. Then years later when I began to have children the fears became paralyzing-like they are now. I now had something-or someone- to lose and I have been even more fearful since my kids. I love them more than anything- my entire life is about them-I homeschool them and everything- and I am always afraid I will get sick and die and leave them without a mother. I also worry about their health and I obsess over it too. Oh and I do have OCD, also, and I have a touch of anorexia-I guess I havent mentioned those yet. They are coping mechanisms to help one feel in control of something- I know it is un healthy and I am seeing a therapist next week! So thats my story. Hope someone can relate.

[Ericipro]

Hope someone can relate.

I can totally relate , my dad was and still is a bad alcoholic , and in my childhood someone was always catching hell for little things that shouldn"t even matter and doesn"t in a normal household. There were many beatings.
This is where the OCD is created , we all go into ourselves to survive this. And later obsessions are born .Then hypo and cyber-chondriacs .

My parents live in Alaska , and I just do better if I stay away from my family and friends in Alaska , most are alcoholic and/or drug addicts ,and I don"t wish to go back to that life , although I am much stronger in that respects now.

I quit drinking 5 years ago , but I use med-pot for insomnea/sleep apnea and anxiety control when needed . It works the best for my kind of depression and doesn"t have the severe side effects/withdrawl of Xanax/Klonopin or Trazadone .

Remember we can"t lose our obsessions , but we can change them - Eric in Oregon

[gofigerr]

Mine is at its worst when I am bored. When there is drama or big change in my life I'm perfect, as soon as things quiet down and life is "good" I get bad. Mine started when I was 19. I started having panic attacks. I think they stem back to seeing my grandma, a full blown hypo, have a panic attack in the mall. I was 8 and we were sitting at the food court, next thing I know she says to this guy at the table next to us "sir, sir, can you call an ambulance" the guy got up, I laughed because I thought she was trying to get his chair for some reason, the next thing I know she's being carted away by the paramedics with oxygen. It was traumatic. I know now that it was a panic attack and she had many many more. When I was about 10 my grandpa was going out the door and my mom and uncle were taking him to the hospital, I remember he couldn't feel his hand it was numb, before he got to the car he turned around and said "I'm fine, it feels ok" my mom, uncle, grandma and aunts were all pleading with him to just go get it checked. He ended up having a major stroke and was never the same. So of course if I ever get a tingling sensation or headache I am always poking the tips of my fingers with a pin to see if I have feeling.

My grandma was "dying" for 70 years! She really just passed away at the age of 90 the doctors kept saying she should have died a few times with bad pneumonia but she was alive by the straight fear of dying!

Hers was a sad life, living in fear of dying for all of those years. I feel like I'm headed down the same road. I've been doing it to myself for 22 now. I have an appointment with a phsychiatrist next week, firts time.